And the word for 2017 is...

Its that time of year again.  Everyone starts chatting about their New Year’s Resolutions.  We hear about people’s health goals (“I’m training to run a marathon this year”), spiritual goals (“I’m going to get up and read my Bible EVERY morning before the family wakes up”), even reading goals (“I’m going to read one non-fiction book a month”).  These goals are great but lets be honest, in most cases, these resolutions won’t last.  Have you ever had a gym membership and saw the difference of crowds in January compared to even February?  We get bogged down by the busyness of life and drop those goals in a heartbeat.  I’ve never really been a resolution girl because I know that I will be like the many that give up too quickly. 

A few years ago my mom started a New Year’s tradition where she chose a word for the year instead of resolutions.  It was like a theme she would focus on for the year.  Sometimes she had a scripture to go along with it.  Sometimes it was just a word that kept popping up over and over again to the point where it got her attention.  The great thing about this practice is that in its simplicity you can see God’s patterns and direction He leads you throughout the year.  Depending on what word you choose, it can be a challenge for the year or it can bring a sense of comfort.

Last year mom and I shared a word, “Held”.  This was an important one for us due to the loss of my babies, Lucas and Lorelei in October 2015.  We were closing a chapter in our lives marked as “2015”, hoping to find peace in 2016.  Little did we know that shortly entering 2016 we would lose my grandmother and my uncle.  And that just covers the grief involved in 2016.  “Held” became a sense of comfort.  It was an odd source, for me anyway.  If you know me at all you know that I have a large personal space bubble.  I don’t like hugs.  I can’t stand that it is socially accepted to hug as a greeting.  Its just awkward.  So just the idea of being “held” makes me uncomfortable.  But that was a position I knew was necessary to get through this year.  It was a position of submission for me.  It was a position of vulnerability, which nobody likes.  God had a lot of lessons for me this year as I was being held.  He taught me about how there are seasons in life- seasons where we give and seasons where we receive.  In my season of grief, I had to sit back and allow friends and family to step up and take care of some of our needs.  That is not easy for me.  I’d much rather do it myself.  God taught me that it was ok to live in the moment, be sad when you are sad and be joyful when you are joyful.  I truly learned the meaning of Psalm 30:5 which reads “Weeping may endure for the night… but JOY comes in the morning.” 

I almost changed my word about halfway through the year because I was tired of that position.  I felt like I was healing well.  I wasn’t such a wreck.  I was feeling like my head was above water so why hang on to such a humble position?  Surely I didn’t need that association with my pain anymore.  I was healthy and on the other side.  But maybe its just the lesson that was ingrained in me as a young child (“finish what you started before you move on to something else”) that   made me stick with it, even under duress.  I thought of a new word and just held on to it to see if it would still be significant as we come up to New Years. 

Turns out, it is.  I still like the message I get from my new word.  But the last few days I have seen it in a couple different ways.  So now the big reveal… my word for 2017 is “overwhelmed”.  I even referenced it in my blog in May (http://called2bow.blogspot.com/2016/05/whelmed.html).  One reason this word was significant to me in 2016 was that I was flat out overwhelmed.  We had so much loss, so much stress and yet life still seemed to swirl around us at such a pace that we struggled to breathe (hence, still needing to be “held”).  But we were also so overwhelmed by God’s presence.  I can honestly say that I have never felt so close to Him.  Full confession time: I slacked in my set “quiet time” because I felt like my life was a quiet time.  I felt so in God’s presence that I didn’t even need to spend specific time with Him. 

A few weeks ago I was texting with three separate friends, at the same time (oh the joys of technology), all about our words for the year.  I truly believe this was a God led conversation because I didn’t even bring this topic up.  I had obviously already decided what my word was but God revealed to me in these conversations that one thing that I wanted to see with this word in 2017 is God’s presence and provision in my friend’s and family’s lives to be just as overwhelming for them as it was for us in 2016.  I want Him to do BIG things in their lives.  I want to see healing, a sense of belonging in the families that are chosen and not necessarily blood, the promise of children becoming a reality and the provision of employment.  I want to see a sense of overwhelming peace come over those that I love where even their temperament and the way they carry themselves is different. 

God brought up a new vision of “overwhelmed” for me just today.  Trey is at grandcamp this week so I have been nesting like crazy.  I’m trying to get the baby’s stuff ready and get control of my house (the clutter is choking me).  Today’s project was cleaning out Trey’s playroom.  This child has more toys than he knows what to do with.  Often times he just dumps bins out and doesn’t even play with any of the toys.  The house ends up trashed and we end up fighting with him to clean up his toys because it bleeds into the family room and I can’t handle it.  We just had Christmas which means more toys.  His birthday is next week which means even more toys.  I am overwhelmed.  As I was cleaning things up, tossing broken things and boxing other things up to be stored downstairs, I realized that I think he is overwhelmed too.  I think that explains why he just dumps his toys but doesn’t play with them.  He has too much.  The sight of it is too much.  He’ll dump everything, find one toy (usually something that isn’t even a toy- like a spatula he stole from the kitchen), take it into the family room and play with it.  So today I boxed up about half of his toys and left all of his new toys from Christmas, leaving room for new birthday toys.  The plan is to put the excess toys in the basement and we will rotate them back in when the Christmas/birthday toys get boring. 

I texted my plan to my mom and realized that I used the word “overwhelmed”, describing myself and Trey.  I ended my text with “overwhelmed is a cue to simplify”.  Hello 2017!  “Overwhelmed” is my word and “Overwhelmed is a cue to simplify” is my theme.    I recognized that, like my son, when I am overwhelmed that is my spirit’s cry to eliminate things that are in the way.  2017 will be a crazy year.  We’re about to have our rainbow baby enter the world.  To say that life will err on the side of “overwhelming” is an understatement.  But I can see myself using that to cue my spirit to simplify.  I already use that logic as I stress about having things ready for Addie Grace.  Her room isn’t ready.  Her car seat, pack in play or stroller are still nestled securely in their boxes.  But when I stress, I remember that we’ll be ready when we are ready.  She has the essentials.  She doesn’t need all the fuss.  She doesn’t need all the “perfect pinterest” things.  What she needs is to be present with the ones that love her dearly, more than she will ever know.  That is what I need and my friends and family need- to be OVERWHELMED by God’s presence and provision.  That is my prayer for 2017- that my family, friends and I will use any sense of “overwhelmed” as a soul cry to search for God’s provision- and to find it in new and indescribable ways.